A startling revelation
maybe not that startling. Not as if I haven’t expected anything like that.
more like a confirmation.
nevertheless, it left me gloomy for the whole of yesterday and part of today. I didn’t think I would have that great a reaction.
I am not suppose to be affected by things like that.
It is not as if it would have made much of a difference anyway. I think it is something like an obstacle in the way of an already blocked path.
Which means, it wouldn’t have made much of a difference whether it was true or not.
But I guess, no matter how rational I think I am, I harbour hope. Which would have been a good thing actually.
it is so weird that something that has no physical impact on my life has such a huge impact on my mind. And I am not even suppose to have anything to do with this.
I can still remember the eyes. But yea, to hell with it. Nothing to do with me anymore.
On a more positive note, at least I understand a little better now. always thought he was just being ridiculous but I think I got it… just a little. but yea.
I feel less sore now. as compared to Friday night. I think I will just forget it when school starts again tomorrow.
Maybe I just have too little things in my life right now. So emphasis is on the wrong things.
I seldom make sense nowadays.