Ghost
Sometimes, I wish I can just stop caring. I should be a freeloader once in a while. The one who gives horrible, no references work. I kept saying that I am a very lucky person when it comes to project mates. And I still think I am. But today, when I thought back, I think it is just a matter of who is willing to take more. Mel complains all the time about hers. I am starting to think that it is because she is more easily frustrated. And I think I am just nice. I prefer to think that they try very hard and are very busy. Which is why their work is not really as good I as I would prefer. I am willing to do more work for them.
But having said that, I still think that mel got worse project mates.
I am lucky because my group is friendly, nice, and willing to care. I thought jl was a super initiative person with great ideas. But I now think that he is more talk than anything else. No substance. But he can carry himself very well. Which I think was partly why I totally loved my group in the beginning because I thought I got someone great.
No I still think I am lucky with groupmates. Just that most people in this world don’t produce very good work. It is normal. I wonder if I am getting complacent, thinking that my work is better than theirs. Maybe. Maybe I shouldn’t be. They are different, not worse.
PH told me that I am in her desirable project mates list. Because I do work, I do good work and I don’t force. Which otherwise translates to I am nice and willing to work. I think I appear condescending sometimes. I am not sure. do I?
Anyway, just a little more to go. Presentation. Lab is dued to friday. But someone already compiled it. 
Ah, my wonderful group members. Of course, once again, me being all arrogant, thinks that it is not good enough. The fonts are not even consistent and the pictures are not inline with the text. But whatever, if I can deal with that business plan, I can deal with anything.
I know given the people I work with, I already shouldn’t be complaining. But I cannot help but wish I have some smarter people in my group. People who will actually read what I write and give feedback. People whose work I am totally ok with.
I hope I have my luck next semester too with that great design project coming up. I wouldn’t mind the same people. Really, I wouldn’t because they are fun to work with. But I doubt I will get the same people anyway. And judging from the way other people are talking about their groups, I don’t think I will be as lucky.
I can see the truth clearer now. He is just a smiling shell.
EventS
I am so busy lately.
I need to do a CNY event log even though it is like 2 or 3 weeks ago. I cannot really remember. This year’s atmosphere isn’t that good. The dislike and hatred in the air. So we went home early as well.. round 9pm. Earliest I can remember. Used to be at least 12. Nevertheless it is also kind of interesting because I haven’t talked to wei in a while and this year, he was sort of there and sort of hanging out with us. I heard him telling the kids about his secret society days. And well, I heard stories in the past about him smoking, fighting and there was the police and everything. So I understood what he meant. But the younger kids were like, “Is it a CCA?”.
-__-
the thing is, he stayed so long to have a look at angela jie’s new boyfriend. But he didn’t come in the end. so… yea.
And then there was the parent’s classmate gathering at my house this year. Mom woke up real early to prepare food and everything. But there was so much left. Enough for lunch, dinner and aunt’s dinner. hm. I didn’t really talk to anyone. Stayed in my room to mug. ok not really. but I stayed in the room. Something funny happened though. One of the daughters, a teenage girl, went to shit in the toilet. Which is just outside my room. And when she came out, she was trying to get the smell out by fanning the door. And she thought nobody was around but I sort of saw it. But I walked away, thought she might be embarrassed if she knew I saw what she was doing. lol. Shitting is a very common and normal thing. But somehow, when done at somebody else’s house, or at a public toilet and you know that the next person is so going to know what you did, it becomes embarrassing.
social thing.
And after that, I was busy with midterms and projects. I have never been so last minute in my life. For the lsm module, the first time I read the last set of lecture notes for the test is on the morning of that test itself. The rest of it, I read the night before. Same goes for the physiology test. Horrible. I am so last minute. But I thought it was still ok, don’t know.
Because of the tests, the project was left alone for a while. So had to catch up with it after that, since we sort of realised that progress report = final report. And final report = presentation. Dued last thursday. Friday, meeting from 6-9pm. New design idea. Weekends: did my own writeup for micronneedle. Thank god I did. we would never had finished if I haven’t. Monday, met 1-4pm. New design, came with a whole lot of design problems. Went home to sleep on it. And Grace came up with a brilliant idea. Which is totally funny because she is the only one who haven’t generated any ideas so far. And the one we used was the one she came up with. Tuesday: meeting 6-10pm. Went home, did some more till 2++. Overslept on wednesday. Did project the whole day. Was a little irritated at Grace and Royden. Kept asking questions, especially Grace. So I finished up my second writeup and helped her. Solved her problems in a few minutes. Wondered why she took the whole afternoon. Helped out here and there and since was the only one who finished stuff, did compiling. Finally finished everything at 5am. People still alive: me, Gim and royden. I was quite ok with the report. But I seriously hated the business plan. which was a piece of crap. but wasn’t in the mood to finish it. Woke up 6am, went for lecture. found out that Mel slept at 3, SX at 4 and PH at 6. The project killed everyone.
They submitted in the afternoon before I could do anything about the shitty business plan. Not like I can do much. Having slept one hour and never written a business plan in my life. Lab was due Friday. So had meeting again. totally zonked. Went home, had tuition, finished lab part. Then roy said lab got extended. which made no difference, but that meant I could go sleep and not hang around wondering anyone is compiling. Physio lab the next day.
there, I finished event logging for the intensive project doing. I think I like my group and is quite lucky to get them, attitude wise not much of a problem. And they are very friendly, so group meetings aren’t a drag, quite fun. But they are not very good at their work. Maybe, it is just different from my style. I don’t know. but I heard worse, so yea.
I hate the business plan. I cant believe we submitted something that crap in.
On another note, cant wait for summer!
Sister wants GAP, Coach and Abercrombie. sigh. But yea, whatever, cant wait!
Good morning
Went to watch Avatar alone yesterday. I absolutely love it. So I think I will watch another time at iwerks. Well, I do wonder what took me so long. Luckily they are still showing it.
Ate lunch alone, walked around alone. I haven’t done this for quite some time. It is strange but I used to be pretty much alone in year one. Nowadays, I just do everything with everyone else. tutorials, labs, etc. I do miss the feeling of being by myself. It is a good feeling actually.
Besides, you don’t have to watch a movie with someone else. But when friends heard, they were kind of shocked. They said I was brave. I wonder why. I didn’t even watch something frightening. And it is not like the someone will kidnap me or something.
so I guess it must be some social thing which I once again is not aware of.
I made a decision today. And I was happy. And very excited.
It is strange. Since that day we handed in the proposal, I have had no contact with my group. And the project is not over yet. Well, I guess everyone is just taking a breather. And it made me realise something. Meetings are fun and comfortable but out of the project, the people are just.. well acquaintances. I don’t really know how to explain it but somehow, these people, no matter how close it seemed or how fun it was during project meetings, they are still groupmates.
Labeled project groupmates.
I guess that is because we all have our “friends group”. Like a mold that no one is ever willing to get out of. The people we stayed with since beginning of college life.
The rest of them can only go as far as acquaintances. Or project mate. like staying safe? I don’t know.
Nevertheless, I am glad that my project mates are ok and fun people.
“What do you mean? Do you wish me a good morning, or mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not; or that you feel good on this morning; or that it is a morning to be good on?”
First time in a MINI
Today, I sat in a MINI!
My first time in a MINI!
So I absolutely have to keep a record. Even though there are so much things waiting for me to do.
Had project meeting until 8++pm. And Royden offered to drive me to vivo since he was meeting his gf there. And then, I realised that he drives a MINI!
Yay, I was going to sit in a MINI!
And he decided to show me the power of his car by doing the very fast acceleration.
Though I thought it was quite dangerous, it was fun. Plus, I was in a MINI!
I sat in a MINI COOPER today.
i miss
This just has to be my busiest sem yet. But it is also my happiest. Somehow, learning became interesting. People became nice to hang out with. And my timetable doesn’t suck that bad after all.
Project work is.. hectic. But I must say I really have good luck with project mates. I really like my group this time and it feels much better than the previous group. I liked my previous group but this one feels friendlier.
I guess this is not such a bad semester after all… just a little more late nights.
Time really flies. It is week 4 already.
I wonder how friends are doing.